For nearly five years I kept a blog of my adventures in the outdoors and sometime during the third year of that blog I hit a wall of sorts. The words that once flowed so easily no longer came and anything that was posted was somewhat forced. The question of why I was doing this crossed my mind often and last fall the plug was finally pulled. In retrospect I guess the words were still there, it was the will that had vanished.
The past year has been a time of introspection for me
and also observing the human condition. Often I find myself wondering
why we as humans make our lives harder than they have to be. It seems
that the majority is racing towards something but I haven't quite
figured out what that is yet. Even in their 'down time' everyone is
racing to accomplish something, it's all in 'the plan' I guess. They
call it having a life but it sure seems to take a lot out of them.
Living, in the truest sense of the word, doesn't involve schedules or
Anymore I find myself observing more than 'doing'
while partaking in my outdoor interests. Whether it's sitting on a rock
along a stream watching a brown trout rise and sip insects off the
surface or sitting in a meadow being pelted in the face by wind, snow,
and rain watching a bull elk work a herd of cows. The fly rod or the
camera takes a back seat to just watching the moment unfold. To me
that's the truest sense of living.
It's late January as I type
this and I haven't gone trout fishing since mid-October. There are
various reasons for that, the weather, the fact that fall stockings have
stopped in the area where I live, that I have to travel to find any
decent fishing come fall and winter (now), and that I have been busy
doing other things. On my desk is a list of flies that I need to tie up
before the weather breaks but it hasn't been started as of yet. I do
look back fondly on that last trip though as it was a memorable one when
the maples were colored up nicely and so were the brook trout.
I did tie up some flies during the late summer and fall including some streamers of my own creation. I call this one the Psychedelic Rainbow.
If the weather ever breaks it would be nice to sneak in a mid-winter fishing trip, even if it only amounts to going through the motions. It seems that this is going to be one of those unrelenting winters, the kind that can test your sanity at times. There are good memories from the fall and hopes for the spring to help during the worst of it. It's all about being in the here and now though, there are things to see, do, and even observe during the bleakest of winter days. Perhaps that's part of what's brought me back here, writing these things down once more. And so it begins again...